Dali was a genius.
Did some thinking again today and i'm really allowing these thoughts to ruin my night. I'm worried. The bone-chilling, goosebumps forming, sweaty palms feeling of anxiousness has struck on another unsuspecting victim again. I'm worried. I'm scared. The future can swing both ways and it's struck me on how the probability of it being bleak is swinging high now. It's struck me how little i worked for these O Levels compared to others. I'm scared and i cant breath now. Its like the stress all over again, wrapping its tentacles all over me, strangling me. Crushing me.
I'm afraid of the future. I'm afraid of growing up. I'm afraid of not getting what i want. I can't imagine doing anything else other then what i love.
You know how people dream of being free, carelessly free. Dreams of sitting, laying, in wide open fields, staring at the stars. I can't dream like that. I just can't. As much as i want to, the negatives take over and it's painful.
I miss my friends. I've never been able to talk to them about much but i really need someone to comfort and assure me on this. Every single regret needs to be reassured. Tell me everything's gonna be just fine.
Afraid of being alone forever. It's my impending doom. The doom i brought upon myself.
Let me live. Let me be happy. I'll earn it. I'll deserve it. Give me one more chance God.
